His only wish
by AerePerennius
Summary: Remus had wished so badly, had hoped against hope that the piece of card in his hand was lying, that it was a bad dream from which he would wake up eventually, that he was just seeing things that weren't really there. AU.


Harry Potter series is work of J K Rowling.

* * *

Remus had wished so badly, had hoped against hope that the piece of card in his hand was lying, that it was a bad dream from which he would wake up eventually, that he was just seeing things that weren't really there but alas only if painful incidents could be erased by such wishful thinking, world wouldn't be such a bad place to live.

Yet, he had held tiny hope in his heart that maybe it was just a prank but seeing the pink and white glittery welcome board in front of Burrow's garden crushed whatever hope had left in his heart.

The board screamed and mocked at him, the otherwise cluttered garden of Burrow was decorated beautifully, chairs and tables had been arranged for small number of guests, enough to hold a small ceremony.

_Wedding ceremony._

Remus swallowed and took a shaky glance at the Board again.

_Welcome to_

**_the wedding_**

_of_

**_N. Tonks & William_**

_August 25th, 1999_

Immediately he got a horrible urge to run. He had dragged himself so far _somehow, _mostly to confirm if it really was the truth but now that he had seen it from his eyes, he had no intention of stepping inside.

After all how could he see _her_ getting married to someone else? How could he see her becoming of someone else's right in front of his eyes?

But hadn't _that_ what he had wanted in the first place?

Right from the start when she had made declaration of her love hadn't he pushed her away by telling her that she deserved someone better?

And now, she was doing exactly that...

Then why he wasn't happy? After all Bill Weasley was a perfect match for her even if he was a widower.

On the day of final battle when Voldemort was vanquished from the world never to return back, Fleur had taken a rather nasty curse. She taken her last breath only two days after and her last wish had been for Bill to move on.

Though Bill had been devastated, with time his pain had numbed a little. Over the course of one year Nymphadora and he had grown close.

_They had connected instantly_, he had been told. After all Bill had been heartbroken over Fleur's death and Dora had been nursing a broken heart too due to his continuous refusals, they had connected over the mutual pain of not being able to be with someone whom they loved.

After the battle, every month Burrow hosted a dinner for their friends which he attended when ever his 'condition' allowed. He had seen from his eyes how good of friends they had become. As in those parties, all he did was to observe _her _from a far distance, with a glass of wine in his hands, chatting with her friends, mostly Bill. He had seen slowly that how color in her mousy brown hairs had returned.

But he hadn't known that Bill had been the reason of that change.

He had simply assumed that she was finally getting over him, but seemingly he had been wrong.

How had it escaped his notice that they were more than friends?

He hadn't even known that they were seeing each other and thus the wedding invitation had come as a jarring shock.

There he had been having his morning tea in his shabby apartment when an owl had stumbled on his window sill. He had gotten up expecting it to be a routine mail but he had nearly emptied the tea in his stomach when he had seen the invitation. A letter had come attached with it too, from Molly. She had rambled in her letter that how happy she was that her eldest was finally moving on and that Dora was finally becoming her daughter in law. And that he simply had to come because only the closest of friends would be there. The wedding date had been of after a week.

He remembered how after the shock had worn off he had torn apart the card, how he had destroyed manually all the furniture and china in his living room in a severe fit of rage. And when the rage had worn off, consuming grief had knocked on his door.

He had remained in a drunker stupor for days when finally he had gathered his wits for the wedding day.

He hadn't felt more wretched in his life and that was saying something.

He didn't need to attend this wedding, he decided.

Just as he was about to take a step back, grinning faces of Fred and George came in to his vision.

He struggled to return the smiles.

"Moony! Our dear friend" Fred started.

"-we must say you are fashionably late-" George continued.

"-but worry not the beautiful bride had not yet walked the aisle-"

"-though the groom is already waiting-"

"-we are the ushers for the lovely occasion, so come on, we'll seat you at your place." One of them finished though Remus no longer paid attention who it was as all his attention had diverted to the word _Bride_.

Bride. She was the bride but obviously not his. She wasn't going to become Nymphadora Lupin, she was about to become Nymphadora Weasley.

_Oh Merlin!_ Why had he pushed her away? The war was over, werewolf regulations and laws were lenient than they ever had been, prejudiced had lessened so why hadn't he gathered his courage on right time to ask her out? To ask her to be his girlfriend, his _wife_, when his own future was as prosperous as it will ever be?

The twins dragged him inside and he instantly noticed the theme. It was pink and white.

Pink. Her favorite color.

Heart thudding and lump in his throat he was seated beside Luna Lovegood who gave him a dreamy smile and commented that how lovely day it was for the union of two souls in love.

_In love._

There had been a time when they had been mad about each other. Well, he still was but she had moved on.

Yes, he had wanted her to move on but deep down he had longed for her to ignore his advice, had wanted her to wear him down until he relented and he would have relented happily.

_But it was too late._

Taking a deep shaky breath he looked around. He saw Harry with Ron and Neville, grinning happily. He saw Molly, Arthur chatting jovially with Minevra. His gaze roamed every where intentionally avoiding one place.

Finally when his curiosity got better of him he looked at the altar to see _him_ standing proudly with a smile, with Charlie behind him as the best man.

He couldn't control the angry bile that rose in his throat at the sight of him. He wanted to petulantly fight him off and stand in his place instead.

_But it was too late, too late._

He wanted to scream, he wanted to rage but he silently sat there and fumed, waiting for the love of his life to marry some other man.

But hadn't this precisely what he had wanted? He should have been careful about he had asked.

He looked around again, and saw familiar friendly faces everywhere but he had never felt so utterly alone.

_All he wanted was her._

He saw few of Bill's friend, approaching him and clapping on his back, apparently joking and make crude jokes that friends make before wedding.

When he saw Bill grinning in response, he wasn't sure he could do it anymore.

But he had to. He had to see the whole damned thing otherwise leaving would be too obvious. He owed the Weasleys this much. After all she too was about to become a Weasley...

His mind swirled with thoughts and questions again, answers to which he'll never get. Had she thought about him when she had said yes to Bill's proposal? Had she thought about him when she bought her wedding dress? Had she even for a tiny moment wished that it was him, instead of Bill?

The soft melody of music broke his thoughts.

_She was coming_. She was about to walk the aisle, where she would be bonded to Bill forever...

Heart thudding painfully in his throat, he slowly turned to look at the place from where she was about to enter.

He gave a tiny gasp as he got a glimpse of her. _Merlin, she looked like an angel..._

She wore a pale pink dress that just barely covered her knees. It was so typical of Dora to not to wear white on her wedding. He looked down to see her walking barefooted on a trail of rose petals. Apparently she had taken to not wearing shoes at all in fear of tripping.

Oh he would always catch her when she would fall but it wasn't his place anymore.

Tiny shimmering diamond earrings shone on her ears as she gave a dazzling smile.

With a sinking heart he realized that it was for Bill.

_Of course it was for Bill. She was about to get married to the bloody man._

Her hairs were brown and were done in an elegant bun with few tendrils falling on her face.

How ironic it was that Remus had never seen her looking more beautiful when she was about to marry other man.

He barely noticed, Ted placing Dora's hand in Bill's.

He felt like he would throw up as he saw Bill lovingly kissing her hand and winking at her to which she blushed.

He blinked back his tears.

_Well done, Remus. You wanted her with someone better and now there she is, about to forever slip away from your grasp..._

He scolded himself and he loathed himself as he realized the truth.

_No, Dora please don't marry... Please Dora I love you... _But his voice was stuck in his throat.

His heart sped up and cold sweat broke down on his head as he saw Dedalus (who was marrying them) announcing happily that how they were gathered their to witness the bond of two souls.

_How can you let this happen Remus? This is your last chance! Do something! _

But what he could have done? Even if he did declared his love right now for Dora just as she did back that day in hospital wing it wasn't as if she would not marry Bill? After all she must love him now to take this big step?

_But she'll at least know that you always loved her. DO something Remus this is your last chance... or you'll truly regret it..._

He was already regretting it, ever since he had seen that damn invitation, he regretted and resented every time he had pushed her away.

_Please Dora, look at me, look at me once, just once to show that you care for me even a bit..._

But she had eyes only for Bill.

_Damn it!_

Dedalus spoke once again, "But before we proceed to the vows, is there anyone present here, who feels that these two should not get married? If yes then please stand now."

Remus desperately looked around that anyone would stand up and say something but no one did. Everyone was smiling and looked truly happy; what reasons did they had to object?

"Very well," Dedalus started again.

"Please wait!" Remus spoke out suddenly not realizing he had said something until words slipped out his mouth; standing at his place before Dedalus could proceed.

He walked shakily out of his seat and he heard various gasps and knew many would be throwing disapproving glances at him but he didn't care, he had eyes only for her.

She was looking at him with confusion and he realized she had seen him for the first time this evening. She hadn't even bothered to check if he had been there. Already embarrassed and humiliated he spoke;

"Dora." He croaked out, his voice was shaky and clogged up, he swallowed several times to continue, "Please don't get married-"

"Remus-" Bill started, with a frown he even took a step forward and he saw Charlie advancing as well in his peripheral vision.

"Please. Please Bill, let me say it. I need to say it, if I have wish of ever finding peace with myself. I know this is not proper... when I have been your family friend for so long but I ask you to let me have my say."

Bill continued to frown but when he didn't speak, Remus took this as his cue to speak further. Looking at them standing next to each other with hand in hand, he felt even horrible when it completely came down to him that he didn't stand a chance.

"Dora... I know I have been _ruthless_ with you. I have pushed you away and away thinking you might be happier with someone thousand times better than me... and you might be, Merlin knows you deserve so much, you deserve all the world's happiness... but being here I couldn't do it, I couldn't see it. I thought I could but I can't for I AM STILL IN LOVE WITH YOU!"

This time he heard collective gasp and he saw Bill clenching his fist but he ignored again. Dora gaped at him in shock.

"I know it's been more than three years since... since we first declared our love and I have only pushed you away but believe me when I say that it has destroyed me every time I said no to you... Every time a tear fell from your eyes or as I watched your hair go brown because of me, _it killed me_... That day on final battle when I saw you falling on the ground my heart literally stopped... all I kept praying was _Oh god please don't kill her, please let her be alive..._ and I was dead too, I was dead too until I saw you getting back up to fight again. I could have fainted with relief... What I want to say, ever since I met you, my life has revolved around you, all I ever truly want is your happiness..." He trailed off.

He looked around to his friends, silently begging them to understand. He saw solemn expression on everyone's face. "And yet..." He turned back to her to say what needed to be said. "Today when I saw you walking the aisle, looking happy, truly happy, I couldn't take it; it was after all what I wanted but why am I not happy? Why I feel so miserable? Maybe because I am a hypocrite... but mainly because it wrenches my gut every time I realize that from now on you'll be of someone else's...

Molly, Arthur, Bill..." He looked at each person's face as he addressed them. "I realize it's insolent of me to stand here and say such things in your own home when you have been nothing but kind to me even when I had no one, you people gave me a sense of belonging and here I am spoiling your such big day." He bowed his head in shame and took a deep breath to look again at Dora. She had a look of concern on her face, her all previous happiness had vanished.

"Remus-" She spoke softly and he laughed with no mirth when he heard her say his name first time in months. It felt so nice to hear her say it.

"No, Dora let me say it. I know it's too late. I know you have decided with whom you want to be and that person is in position to love you back... I know." He sniffed as weight of his words bore upon him. "But I needed to tell you one last time that I love you... I always have and I always will, until my last breath but... but if you have even a spot of...of feelings left for me..." He stammered not sure how to say what he was about to say, right at her wedding when she was already at altar with another man about to exchange rings. "If you feel that you can even _think_ of forgiving me and giving me a chance... then please save me... save me from this hell hole I'll fall in without you. I promise you I'll love you till eternity, I'll do everything in my being to give you every happiness... please if possible come back to me and I'll never even _think_ of pushing you away..."

He finished and begged her silently to understand him one last time.

Suddenly someone laughed.

He didn't need to look much far to see who it was laughing because they were just standing beside Bill.

Charlie was chucking continuously, shaking his head and Remus felt shame prickling his face.

Shortly Fred, George and Ron had started laughing at him too.

What surprised him most was when Molly, Arthur, Ginny and Hermione started laughing as well and soon enough whole garden was filled with mocking and jeering laughs, with exception of Dora who was staring at her with expression of something like... pity.

_Of course they will laugh at him, even if they are my friends, after all which woman in their right mind would choose him over Bill?_

He ducked his head, embarrassed and ashamed and _heartbroken_ beyond belief as he unintentionally took a step backwards.

"EVERYONE STOP!" Dora suddenly shouted over their laughs. "You are humiliating the poor man!"

"But Tonks-" Bill spoke in between his chuckles but a glare from her sobered him.

"I-I should go." Remus mumbled as the chuckled lessened but did not completely died down.

"Like hell you should, Remus!" Kingsley commented from his seat.

"Yes after coming till here, we won't let you chicken out." Arthur spoke up.

"Yes but don't you think we should stop laughing? He's probably thinking we are laughing at him." Hermione admonished others even if she herself was smiling.

"I-I am sorry for spoiling your day." Remus spoke again, not sure what was going on. But as soon as he turned around a soft gentle hand caught his wrist.

"Not so soon Remus." Her sweet soft voice floated to his ears and he turned around to look at Dora standing close to him, smiling tenderly, peering at him through her eyelashes.

"I am sorry Remus if we gave you a right scare there." Bill said and now that he had stopped laughing his smile seemed... _friendly_.

He looked puzzled around at others who have started coming closer to him and were smiling encouragingly.

"Remus..." Dora placed her hand on his cheek and turned his face. "It took you long enough, Merlin I thought I had lost you forever..."

"Dora..." He whispered huskily. "What's going on here?"

This time Charlie spoke up, grinning. "You see, this wedding was a sham."

"It never was supposed to happen in the first place." Harry said for first time, giving Remus a smirk.

"It was all an... elaborate stunt we all pulled." Ginny continued standing next to Harry.

"Yes for you to see sense." Hermione said matching the grin of her friends.

"Wait-wait... I don't understand..." Remus said looking around his friends who had now gathered in a circle around him with Dora and him in between. Dora was still holding his hand which was a comfort in this turmoil.

"I'll explain." Bill started. "You see, I have always known Tonks but over the course of past year, we became real close friends. I knew she was always pining for you, even if you were both not on talking terms, she still loved you. After... after Fleur passed away... Tonks comforted me and as I said we grew close, but not like that as you are thinking... we grew close as friends or siblings you may even say. After losing Fleur, I realized what it was living without a loved one and I didn't want my friend to suffer the same fate even if her love was alive. So we came up with a plan which would force you to see errors of your ways and possible force you to confess your feelings. This wedding, was solely for this purpose; to open your eyes and to give you a taste that what it felt like to give up your love to someone else."

As soon as Bill finished Ted spoke up, "You see, two weeks ago was full moon and Dora was a right mess though she had hidden it well; we all realized that she still loved you just as deeply. We couldn't console her anymore by saying that '_Don't worry dear, he'll come around-_"

"After all already three years have passed and you haven't done a thing." Andromeda started in serious tones for first time."So we gave Nymphadora an ultimatum. That she agrees to this deal and if you confess well it's all good enough but if you don't we'll all help her to move on."

"You might have felt that this was your last chance and in a way it really was because if you hadn't spoken up today, we had taken a promise from Tonks that she was going to do everything in her capacity to move on and of course we would have helped her." Arthur said. "Charlie even agreed to take her to Romanian Ministry for transfer but we hoped it wouldn't come to that."

"To start the plan, we published the fake invitation and sent you to it a week before so that you can have a bit time to let it sink in." Fred spoke up grinning ear to ear.

"And today we charmed this whole garden to make it look like a real wedding and waited for you. When you came, we both were observing you from a distance so that if you tried to leave, we can get to you." George finished.

"You- you mean to say this all was an _act_?" Remus breathed not daring to believe his ears and eyes. "Dora you aren't really getting married to Bill." He couldn't believe his luck and he felt his knees would give away.

"No, Remus she isn't." Bill said with a soft sad smile. "I- She's my very good friend but only Fleur has that place in my heart. I know her last wish was for me to move on, to live my life and I am living it. Tonks helped me overcome my grief but I don't necessarily have to get married to move on..."

"He's right Remus..." Dora said after everyone had quieted down. "I had loved you for so long that I had no idea what it is to _not_ to love you. But I had given up all the hope that you'll ever accept me." She said sadly as a pain flickered her face.

"Oh Dora..." Remus palmed her face and tenderly wiped a stray tear. "I am so sorry..." He placed his forehead on hers, barely able to believe that she wasn't going anywhere.

"We are sorry Remus if we hurt your feelings, but this was necessary." Hermione said solemnly.

"No, no... you people- thank you, _thank you_..." He looked around him in gratitude. "You helped me, and I'll forever be grateful because you gave me enough courage to fight for my Dora. And the pain I felt for a week ever since receiving that invitation, is nothing compared to all the hurt I have given her over years." He looked back in to her eyes. "I am so sorry Dora, I wasted _years _to get to this point."

She tearfully shook her head and embraced him fiercely.

He buried his head in her neck for a moment and breathed deeply. "I love you Dora." And with that he pulled away to place a tender kiss on her lips for first time in years as a '_Finally_' chorused through the crowd.

_Finally_, really. After three years of pushing and pulling, he finally got his Dora; not that she had been too far from him to begin with. But all this made him realize that his life won't be worth living if she wasn't there in it. He had been barely living for years but kissing her, touching her, finally having her to himself, made him feel alive like he had never felt before.

"You know Remus-" one of the twins started and this time Remus was blinded with joy to care who it was talking.

"-we just charmed the welcome board-"

"-it now says Welcome to the wedding of N. Tonks & Remus-"

"-and we have already paid Dedalus the fees for performing the ceremony-" Molly said this time.

"-yes and since you have waited too long already we don't think you should wait another moment-" Minevra said sternly but with a twinkle in her eyes.

"Yes the girl is right here in wedding dress and Bill can gladly exchange the wedding robes that were initially meant for you anyway; you'll never get a better opportunity." Harry prompted.

Overwhelmed with giddiness he chuckled out, "But I don't have a ring." Everything was happening way too fast for him but he didn't really mind. His life had gone too slow up till now.

"Oh but we do!"

Charlie handed him a beautiful gold band. "Do it right now Remus and go get your girl."

He would have said no to the ring on some other occasion; he would have said that he won't take charity or something like that, but today he didn't. Today he decided to be a normal man who freely accepted gifts from his friends without worrying about it being a charity.

He stared unflinchingly at Dora and slowly went down on his one knee as the women 'awwed' and men cheered.

"Nymphadora Tonks, I should have done this the moment I set my eyes on you. I was a fool to waste such precious time but now no more. I want you to be mine _this instant_, and I am like-like mad for you! Please my love will you marry me?" Remus said all the while smiling broadly.

Dora knelt in front of him and lunged him in a hug. "You silly man! You don't even have to ask... Yes, I will marry you." She cried out in his shirt.

Within an hour he was kissing his new wife with him in groom's robes with his friends clapping and congratulating. He had no clue how from the worst day of his life it had turned in to the best day he ever had.

His only wish was fulfilled as Nymphadora Tonks became Nymphadora Lupin.


End file.
